Didge Doo

Public speaking is terrifying for many people. How do YOU cope? Any tips?

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12 Answers

Ray  Dart Profile
Ray Dart answered

I was summoned to a (potential) customer in the Midlands to give a technical overview of one of my company's products.

It was a product I knew VERY well, so I did no preparation, expecting a meeting with a couple of tech. Staff.

When I arrived, they had readied the lecture theatre, and I was facing about 200 people, from directors, through accountants down to production functionaries.

So, I winged it, with the aid of a white board, I managed to speak for about 20 minutes, got a few laughs and did a 10 minute Q&A session at the end.

The audience applauded.

What a buzz!

I LOVE public speaking - don't get much opportunity these days.

(We sold them about $750,000 worth of kit over the next 18 months.)

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Didge Doo
Didge Doo commented
Sounds like a profitable half hour.

You reminded me of a comment of Isaac Asimov's. He was in a parade heading to a university function at which he was guest speaker. He said to the chancellor, "By the way, what do you want me to talk about?" And without losing stride the chancellor said, "About 20 minutes."
Ray  Dart
Ray Dart commented
Actually, I probably oversold that. Trying to picture the audience (from many years ago), it was probably nearer to 100. But hey, 200 sounds better :)
Ancient Hippy Profile
Ancient Hippy answered

I spoke at training seminars for a few years and was absolutely terrified at the first meeting. I was only speaking to about a dozen people and I'm sure that my fear was showing. My dad suggested that I sit in a chair, whether I was speaking from a stage or at floor level with the audience.

I spoke at quite a few seminars with some pretty large audiences. I always requested a chair be provided. After my introduction, I'd sit and explain that I was just a little tired and somewhat lazy. That usually got a laugh and relaxed the listeners AND me. I'd be sitting for a while and then stand, walk around while speaking, sit down, get up and so on.

Another tip from my father: Never say "any questions?" Always ask  "what questions do you have?" It's more inviting and you'll usually get many more questions.

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Didge Doo
Didge Doo commented
Sounds like good advice, Hippy. I'd have been terrified in my teens but I've done quite a lot over the years. It can be fun.
Ancient Hippy
Ancient Hippy commented
Lucky for me, all of my seminars were very informal. I was in my twenty's at the time and I don't think I'd have any anxiety at my age now.
Virginia Lou Profile
Virginia Lou answered

Hi Didge,

Very young in public school, the requirement to give a talk to my class was a monumental crisis of life-threatening proportions...especially since I stuttered. I would actually go numb all over.

What I did was to make a yellow papier-maché dog, and it did the talking for me! I even got laughs the presentation was a success.

As an adult, I only speak on a subject so fascinating that overrides everything else...although even there, I use a projector and the beautiful illustrations give me confidence.

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Didge Doo
Didge Doo commented
What an absolutely brilliant idea, and so creative. You had to be a winner before you even took the microphone. If I remember correctly you once mentioned it on Ask, but I'd forgotten.
Virginia Lou
Virginia Lou commented
I think I did! I even had a name for him...
Creativity of desperation; truly felt life-ending for me.
Janis Haskell Profile
Janis Haskell answered

I usually start out focusing on one inanimate object toward the back of the room, like a post or a door, until I start feeling more comfortable.  Then I can start looking at the real faces in the audience.

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Didge Doo
Didge Doo commented
I used to watch for wrist watches, as well. When they started sneaking surreptitious looks at the time, or shuffling on the seats, it was time for another joke. :P
hey cameron Profile
hey cameron answered

I get really nervous before public speaking, but once I'm actually I'm doing it I'm much more relaxed and can get really into it, but I have to be talking about something I actually care about and know a lot about.

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Didge Doo
Didge Doo commented
Back in the day, Mrs Didge signed up as a senior student for a matriculation course. One of the first things they had to do was give a 10 minute talk. One guy, Bruno, wrote his out on a single sheet of A4 but while he was waiting to read it, kept rolling it around and around till it formed a pencil thin tube.

When the he stood up to give his talk the paper kept rolling up on him and he couldn't read it. I never forgot the poor man's embarrassment.
Jann Nikka
Jann Nikka commented
😄
Maurice Korvo Profile
Maurice Korvo answered

I started teaching, and found that when I began I was nervous, but as I got into the material, which I knew and enjoyed, I forgot to worry about the people and just enjoyed getting the material across  to the them. Perhaps not confident in myself, but I was confident in the subject.  Never read to the audience, but may have used a few notes to keep me on track.

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Didge Doo
Didge Doo commented
I think it's the preparation that's the key. I've never read to an audience, either. A few notes on the back of a business card are enough to keep on track. :)
Nealious James Profile
Nealious James answered

Hi
Didge! Public speaking can indeed be pretty scary if you are not used to it!
Some people get into serious training to master the art and others are simply born
to be comfortable with crowds. I only did it on three occasions during my
studies and the first time was an expected disaster. You need to avoid
stressing yourself and come prepared for the speech!

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Didge Doo
Didge Doo commented
Good advice, NJ. It's all in the preparation.

But the interesting thing about big crowds is that once you get them laughing, they'll laugh at anything. Heck, they'll laugh at NOTHING! It can be a lot of fun.
Aldrich Ames Profile
Aldrich Ames answered

I've never been outgoing in real life. Public speaking gives me panic attacks. I do something similar to Janis. I just stare at something which doesn't look human until I think "Quit being a #!€$% and be confident" and look at the crowd, immediately shiver, start sweating and focus right back on to whatever I was focusing on. The first time I publicly spoke, lol "publicly". It was at my high school about a very sensitive topic which I thought about and tried to go for it. I would've probably been ridiculed, bullied or even expelled. Good thing, I had a severe panic attack right when I was about to start the speech and it was cancelled.

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Didge Doo
Didge Doo commented
Sorry to hear that. Must have been tough. The good news is that, like anything else, you can get used to it. I could never have done it as a teen but as an adult it just seemed natural.
Aldrich Ames
Aldrich Ames commented
It wasn't really tough. I consider myself lucky. Considering the fact that my speech could've either went good and people saw the light as to what I was talking about. Or it could've went completely horrible and people ridiculed me for even bringing up the subject. The latter was very likely. So I'm sort of happy for my stage fright.
PJ Stein Profile
PJ Stein answered

My grandmother was a member of Toastmasters and had tried to get me involved when I was in high school. I told her there was no way I was confident enough to do that. Unfortunately school forced me to do it anyway. By the time I got to college, thankfully I had an instructor that let us pick our subjects. It helped that I could use the information from research projects for another class to create my speeches. 

When I was in class I would just focus on my friends. We all spilt up so you would appear to be looking around the room, but you are actually focusing on friendly faces. I also used to work in a department store and would have to announce sales over the PA system. Most people just read what was written. One day I actually read it like I was telling a friend about the sales. My boss was so excited he ran up praising me. The other people who had to do the announcements were not happy with me. After a few customers made comments about the new announcements they all felt better about them.

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Didge Doo
Didge Doo commented
It can certainly work for you. You probably didn't know that Sasquatch (from Ask) joined Toastmasters. She loved it although at the time I last spoke to her (early this year) she was just about to give her maiden speech. She was looking forward to it.

I can imagine how your boss reacted to a bit of personalityu in the announcements. I learned when I was the breakfast announcer for a community radio station that normal conversation doesn't work when you're addressing a crowd or talking on the air. It sounds boring. You've gotta inject some personality into it, and you obviously did just that. :)
Tris Fray Potter Profile

I get hyper-excited when I am speaking on stage.  I start to speak really quickly and it's like I'm high on something, when I'm completely fine.  To control this, I have to stop and take a deep breath to calm down.

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