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As A Mother, What Is The Hardest Part Of Raising A Son?

What is the biggest challenge?

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    Hi my friend.  Well for me, the hardest part of raising sons was being unable to imagine the place they were expected to be (by others) in that role-not truly knowing from personal experience what it is to take on the and live in the world as a man. I could see my sons only as a my children and human beings--I lacked the experience and perspective of being in the world as he would be expected to be--or to help him walk that path as a man.  My sons--amazing persons with much to offer as a human beings--that is how I saw and see them.  I have no personal concept what it is to be a man by my society's standards other than the pressures and expectations expressed and experienced through others' eyes, or other than what a man might be from the perspective of this woman.  As his mother and one who loves my children beyond words to express, I still could not guide them on the path of being men in the world from the many experiences of growing up from a child into a man, and then living as one in this society.  

    We (my sons and I) know our love for one another, but i could not be in this place --as far as the experience of being a man, I had none, and could not share with my sons my personal experience or wisdom from that place, but only as a mother who loves them as people.  That was hard from my perspective, because I wanted (and want) to give my children everything they might hope for and need.
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    Guest 

    answered 9 months ago

    I do know exactly what you are saying. I liken it to standing on the sidelines wringing my hands with a look of confidence on my face. What a sacrifice it is as mothers to have to let go. We have to be careful not to cripple them so that they can not fly! We can not show them the path that we have never travelled. God Bless you, you are a great Mom, and a wonderful, warm, and inspirational friend....*p
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    Pencil

    commented 9 months ago

      I'm raising my son on my own and have not had any difficulty with him yet except, doing anything around the house you must sound like a broken record for him to hear or act like he hears you before he will move and get it done,that I can handle but all other things we started talking about friends, the world etc.. Early what I would allow,and what I wouldn't, The hardest thing in raising a son alone is talking about relationships as they tend to think they are getting a one sided story because it is coming from MOM..........and some things they don't wish to talk about with mom and that is understandable and out of respect......  
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      Bgirl525 

      answered 9 months ago

      My Hero was the same. He would literally walk over a garbage can that was running over on the floor and it bothered him not a wit, LOL. I know the "in a minute MOM', too. Keep on keeping on, they will learn, if you don't get them to do it, they will get it in the next phase of life, but doesn't it just tempt you to whap them, LOL and love my friend...*p
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      commented 9 months ago

        Well, I have a Son who is 29. I also have a daughter. They were both a handful when I was raising them.......I guess the hardest thing that I can think of is-----allowing for them to make their own mistakes, plus-----letting them clean-up their own mess.......This isn't easy. You don't want your children to hurt. But, if you interfere here, they won't learn and grow. Most everybody will admit that the best lessons learned in life are "Experience"...........love, cyndi
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        Cyndi-c 

        answered 9 months ago

        There you go, my friend, that is exactly the key here. You are a great Mom and wonderful friend, good work, and well done....*p
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        commented 9 months ago

        My answer is a mix of ms. Amore & ms Cyndi's as well...



        • allowing the`boy/man to make his own mistakes [as hard as it is for a mother to watch them fail] but they will earn & gain from this


        • to teach them how to treat a woman [without being made fun of by their peers]


        • allowing them to choose their own buddies [only to be 'dissed' by many] but again this will make them stronger and choose more carefully.

        I hope this helps sweetie...all my love to ya gal.<3 Nassy
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        Nascarnut 

        answered 9 months ago

        I guess the hardest part was trying to make him believe that his dad still loved him and cared about him eventhough he was never around. My son craved a man's attention as he was growing up. How can I explain the extreme anguish in my heart everytime I had to see that little boy's face when his biological father disappointed and neglected him? Unfortunately his biological father was less than a "good father". My son is now a young man and I still can see he has a small void in his heart. Even though for half his life he had my present hubby, who loves my son and vice-versa....I suppose in my sons eyes it was not the same as having his "real" dad's attention. I guess the good thing is that my son knows that my husband and I would walk on water for him and all of our children, and he also knows that I love him enough for 10 parents put together.
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        Guest 

        answered 9 months ago

        I raised my son without a 'father', that meant a lot to him, that his father was not there. All he has is stories, and they are few. Unless you have witnessed the pain, they really will not speak of. We had Role Models, volunteer friends and Coaches, pastors, Grandpa's, Neighbors, temporary dads, but it is something my son grieved for, the relationship with his dad that he never got to have. I got a Dad, who has been there on and off, and I am not sure he didn't get the best of it. I am with you.
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        Pencil

        commented 9 months ago

        Yes, grieving is the appropriate word to describe. No man, however good he was in my sons life, whether it be my wonderful husband, my brother, brother-in-law, etc., couldn't fill the void for this boy. I'm just thankful he knows he has me forever.
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        Guest

        commented 9 months ago

          The hardest part of raising my sons is letting them learn from there mistakes  i love my children and so does my husband but the really hardest part for me was when the girls came along i did not for one minute expect to lose my sons like i have. I am here for them but it seems they have forgotten they have a mother.
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          2489 

          answered 8 months ago

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