I Want To Get Over My Girlfriend's Past,What Do I Do?

Dear friend, you say that you love her so much. Then express your love matter with her. If you are real lover,then you should never go back of her. But you should live in such a way that she should come back of you for everything. she should feel surprised to see your way of living. she should want feel proud  to live  with you or talk to you.

One more never express your inferiority/problems with her. if she  really loves you then she will obviously try to find your problems with remedies. of course "why do you want to know about her past days if you are true lover?"

everyone is the same , but think to yourself why have none of the past relationships worked out? they obviously were not compatible so you need to look what is happening now not the past.She has made a decision to be with you , you are the one she loves .
But maybe you need to  let her know how you feel, don't bottle it up and stew over her past otherwise it will just eat away at you and you will most probably push her away by being insecure.

Hay buddy I know what you r feeling .look at first it depends on if u are just kissing other guys or if its been all the way ..in my case it was all the way and i wasnt told about number 2 until after i was married before then I though i was number 2 and I wasnt happy about that ,she was 20 when i met her so i thought that only 1 guy before me was pretty dam moral of her that i really respecked her for alot concidering all the lose ,easy so afraid to be a virgin because its not cool or not popular ,,its sad that all the girls that got around because that was popular will  be hit with this same question from the guy that they been prayin for all thier lives the 1 that will love them the way everygirl whats .thats when it comes back to haunt them ,,then they have to answer to that [1]tell the truth or lie ..both will hurt them, the truth he may try to live with it and say im a man and i can take it .but right from the begining he will not think the world of u ,he will love u but it will dig little by little he start asking u questions like iam i the best kisser or am i the best lover .what did the other guy do to u, then one day hell look at your lips your mouth and then wonder ,dam do i want to kiss a mouth that had some guy or guys tunge or the other guy stuffs in and out of it .then it going to move to do i really want to kiss the other parts of her body. also when the arguments start the names start words that hurts ..shell come back at u ,,yes the other guy was much bigger  or better in every way ,,we never did that stuff but we seen it ,its no matter what a realationship is what ever the 2 of u make it ..and if she lies in the begining ..and u find out and u will because it will eat at her soul ,,shes always worried espeialy around people she knows somes going hold it over her head and when u do find out u where lied to right from the start .so when did she ever tell the truth ,thats going to hurt ,from my own experance ..it crush my heart i would have bet my life that she was a good girl .a good girl ..iam a grown man and it still hurts me so bad tears r coming out off my eyes ..why did GOD want me to hurt so bad everything that i thought was r s the other guy that i did know about she was only with 5 times so i thought i was really the 6  timer only 5 times before me thats nothing so i thought we shared all the rest of al the innocents where ares r marriage was so pure ,sacred ,pure ,,iloved so much ,i found out that i was mister [how did she say it through the tears i was in gage to him for 3 years from 16 to 19 i was young and stupid and [i stop her and asked her so what number was i she said i dont know i screamed how many times a week she said i lived with him in r house allmost every night i guess.  i said your house .yes .i asked how old is this guy ,she turn and her friend who said out load over music to my wife not knowing i was behind her i cant believe brian never found out about u screwing that 6 foot 5 250 pound sleeze bag when u were 16 and a hundred pounds .my wife said shhh turning to tell her to shut her up..thats when she saw me standing right behind her friend ... i was walking over to get my love and bring her to the dance floor because i asked the dj to play r wedding song ..the party was for my wifes anaversarie present we were celabrateing r 20 th anaversary i couldnt  speak ijust looked at her ..the world i knew ended she walk over to touch me but i stopped her  .i havent touched her since that was a year ago to night ..happy anaversary .sorry for writeing al this ,,but this is real and the dishion u r trying to make could effect u for  the rest of your life ..this will get worse and worse until u both sit down and talk like adults have her read this and take it very serious .then she has to write down everything that happend in her past everything and each guy how far how many tims everything bjs ,,this is to her sweet heart u got to tell him everything everything if u want him to be able to real ax an get it all out or he will always be thinking about it all the time everytime he kisses you and i mean everytime ,,if u say u love this guy then do it it will be your writen statement to realive your self . youl shead all you sins and anything u remmber with the other guy s replace through times with this guy ddont lie dont lie it will come back to ruin everthing that u love   good luck ....big brother

You need to accept her for the good and the bad.  If you can't then maybe you should consider being by yourself until you figure it out.  The way I see it the past is the past and I'm sure everybody has a bit of a past.  Another give her credit she loves you so much to tell you about the past

Don't overthink it too much.
Just remember that they're the reason you two are together now.
They weren't good enough for her when they were together.
Prove yourself that you're the one & you're worth her time than the others.

I have the same problem my gf has had 3 bfs before me...she is my first gf..im already a really jealous person to begin with..so it hurts me when she talks about the things she has done in the past...

If she was honest with you about everything and she loves/trusts you enough to say that she regretted it, the only thing you can do is to just get over it. Give it some time, it might even take a year or more to get completely over it. If you know she's worth it because she's proven herself to be a different/better person when she's with you and you truly love her, then you have no choice and it will get better. I was in a similar situation a while back, and eventually you just don't care. There are a million things you can blame to help yourself deal with it, but you finally learn to accept that girls are just as horny as guys and if guys just happened to have the same opportunities as girls they would take them too and some people just make mistakes because they were young and didn't know how to deal with their feelings yet because society is telling them that its cool to have sex as soon as possible with lots of people. And honestly, if you really love her, you just don't care after a while because you know she won't ever do it again and you get to spend the rest of your life with the coolest person in the world or you can end it because of some stupid things that doesn't involve you at all. Yal weren't in love then.  I've almost stopped the happiest memories of my life from happening because I didn't think I could get over it, but eventually....you just...forget. I chose to spend my life with the prettiest/coolest person who makes my life wonderful everyday. Just give it time.
Good luck. Peace

I'm going through the same thing now...but I had something I consider a miracle.  She was with one guy before me, her only other serious relationship.  They "did the deed" and when I first found out I was hurt.  I personally had saved myself for marriage, I was devastated.  However, as I got to know her I fell in love.  Some of the things I said I'd never do seemed to change...I proved my love by doing that deed with her, once, just to prove to her (she has some trust issues because of that same guy) that I love her and want to be with her forever.  I mentioned a miracle right, well here it is:  Her hymen was still there!  Fully intact!  The guy before me never broke it, she said afterward she was told it's still there.  I was the one to break it...so technically I took her FULL virginity, what I prayed for from God and he granted me that miracle.  Yes she has a past, she did things with him that still hurt me a little but I must admit it's getting better.  As time goes on I'm starting to see how much she loves me and how much I love her.  One line I heard once was: "Don't worry that you're not her first, just be thankful that you're her last because that's what matters."  Also, think for a second, she's yours, not the other guy's.  You're in love so you know how great a person she is...that guy was a MORON for letting her go so feel sorry for him he let such a prize go...revel in his unluckiness, sneer at his stupidity, hate him not her.  She's yours, all yours so focus on that.  I've never replied to one of these before because I was looking for insight...but I can see God's hand in our relationship and I do consider the fact that the hymen was still there completely to be a miracle!  I love her and that's all that matters, she's mine and not his, he doesn't know what he let go, he lost the crown jewel, the best and now I have her and I'm not letting go!  Don't let this ruin your relationship, let it strengthen it, she told you means she trusts you and that she's serious because if she wasn't she'd lie just to get what she wants, right?  She's trusting you not to judge but to love her and you're breaking that trust.  Look at it this way, if one of your family members does something wrong, really wrong, will you still love them?  Of course you will, they're family and you'll always love them!  If you love her that must mean you may want to marry her, making her family.  How can you hold something up against someone that's family?  Would you want your father, mother, sister, brother to hold up a mistake you made in your past and not want to see or be with you anymore over it, of course not!  Love her for what's inside. You've touched a love that nobody else has. You've touched her soul if she loves you back...and that might be something that other guy never got to touch!  Physical beauty is important but isn't the end all be all of dating...it's what's in the mind and heart that count, right?  That applies here as well, she loves YOU, not him YOU!  The physical doesn't matter as much as the spiritual and if you're in love that's a great spiritual connection.  Could she have been in love before?  Yes.  However, every time it's a little different.  Think about this, it really helped me:  If you could have a girl with NO sexual past but you aren't really compatible or a girl with a little sexual past but you are VERY compatible, which would you choose?  Another point is that many that haven't done anything EVER may crave it more later in life, thinking they missed out on other opportunities and want to explore those.  If you have someone a little experienced, they know what that's like and they want to be with YOU.  None of the others.  They've experienced a few other things but they stick with you because it's YOU they know they love...you can't know what love is until you know what just liking a person of the opposite sex is, right?  I know this was kind of long for an Anonymous post but I had a lot to say, this is a topic that is VERY close to me because I'm dealing with it too, writing this has helped me as well.  She loves you dude, don't screw that up, that's not something that comes by every day...plus in today's society, odds of finding a virgin are less and less...plus odds of finding a virgin you LOVE, almost astronomical.  I can see God's hand in my relationship, look for signs she's the one, little signs of similar personality, past, interests or even running into each other unexpectedly a lot or chatting a lot.  Other things too.  If you love her, stay with her, it gets easier over time...I don't think it ever FULLY goes away but about 99% away after a while.  Hope that helped and hope you read this far!  Good luck!

Don't thank about the bad thank of the good

U sed some really good things there blank things ive already worked out, yet heard from you first , good job.

Ok-  I am the girlfriend,.   My boyfriend cant get over my past .. I am 27  and have not been with alot of people.. I was however married and we share three childern.  My current bf I truely love. I am smiling now just thinking of him.  He asks constantly about my past ....  I understand where he is comming from but I dont want to waste all of our time now talking about things that no longer matter.  The only thing that matters to me now is him and me .... The only thing we ever argue about is me and my past or my failed marriage.   I was young and made a mistake and married young ...  I did not even know love like this existed.   

I am sure your gf feels the same way.   She loves you now...  And your wasting good moments wondering about things that truely dont exist anymore.

Get another girl

The boyfriends were in her past. They will always be in the past. You cant hold this fact against her. Maybe some people try to find love and some people can have 50 odd relationships till the right one comes along. Have faith in her or you will loose her.

People telling you to 'get over it' does not help in these situations.
If someone has never experienced these feelings they cannot possibly know how all consuming and destructive they are..
I have great empathy with anyone who has or has had these feelings. I lost a girlfriend because I couldn't get over her past. I used to think if I could just understand everything about her previous relationships it would help me come to terms with them ... But in some ways it just made things worse. In the end my concerns about her past destroyed our future. My advice is don't go there.

My pet theory is having terrible jealousy like this is a self defense mechanism and 'natural' ... Built in our 'genes' from thousands of years ago when people lived in tight knit communities and there was a need to spread the gene pool. By making us feel bad about someone who had already slept with someone else we'd be more likely to go and find someone 'fresh'.
I know this doesn't help ... But it may explain why these kind of feelings are so prevalent and so many people experience them. The trouble is nowadays things have moved on a lot and people have sex very young and with lots of different people to 'experiment'.

I have a new girlfriend who, guess what, has a past. I have learnt not to ask ... But this does not make my knot of jealousy disappear. The thing is I am not an insecure person of anything and we love each other very much. This just goes to prove to me that these feelings are something that we can't really help at our core ... The best we can do is try and control and suppress them.

My way of dealing with this has to believe that I am in a happy 'bubble' with my now girlfriend. And that if my jealous fiend comes out to play ... I treat him as an enemy that is a clear and present danger to my bubble and must be beaten down at all costs. He is not allowed to come into that bubble because that would destroy everything I hold dear ... As it has in the past.

Tell he wat she did before she had you wat made her dump her previous boyfriend and tell her its not because you dont love her its so that you dont make the same mistake

Well that was her past and you have to look at her in the eye and you will know what she is sayin! And what iam hearing...you should not be jealous because she is not doin anything and know it all bout relationships!so dont be jealous because those men in her past are gone(you know just frends) but it is ok!!!

Dear friend if u don't want to hurt her or  u don't want to hurt yourself then don't think about.  Get over it now. Ill been though the same thing so get over it . And live a happy life.

I feel the same exact way. Just try to tough it out, and if your in love with the girl...let it go. The past cannot be changed, but her love for you is probably greater than anything she had with anyone else. Hope i helped man.

Just release her dude,and make your mind to do other good things,no drought  above all comments are good,but don't you think that  this is like a daises which will for whole life,
Don't trust on girls,they can easily create fake emotions on face. Be practical
if you think about love....i am sorry this is just a stupid emotion...you want to know about it ...just release her, with in a month time she will have another boy friend...take it positively,
**** see there lots of things in life to do,and keep it in your mind. Think before you love some one...where your partner from and what you know about her background,...


Just release her dude, first love first love...that every one has a great memories about it and know one forget this...it will make you mad...so find new one that you should know about the full back ground......