Will He Ever Marry Me?
I have been with this person 8 years and want to step things up. He's been telling me he's going to ask me to marry him over two years now..... He lives two houses away from me and lives with his mother. Oh, we are both 42 years old. Should I wait it out, or get out now?
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I would find someone else. This 42 year old man who still lives with his mother and has been pulling your chain for 2 years with almost proposals of marriage, is a loser. Get out while you can.To set up a household for the 2 of you, costs money. He obviously doesn't want to spend money when he can get everything free. I may be wrong about this. but the time you have already been together, and the fact that he lives with Mom is suspicious. I have known guys like that, and they don't make good husbands. It sounds like you are the force that keeps this relationship going, and it takes 2. This guy sounds like a Mothers boy, an underachiever, and he is thoughtless about your feelings. I am sure you can do better!
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You say you've been with this guy for 8 years and the last 2 years he "said" he was going to ask you to marry him?? Well, why didn't he ask you when he was discussing it?? You need to go on with your life, he isn't going to commit to you or to anyone. He's got his mother and doesn't need a wife!! Drop him and quit wasting your time on this loser......
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Honey I am SORRY to say I agree with all of the above answers. He is not going to marry you. It is time to let, move on you have been in this relationship to long. You are 42 yrs. Old life is to short. You should tell him to marry his mother. Do you know you could have meet someone else by now. And could be happy. I'm sure you want to have a male in your life but not this one. Lazy man you have now. There are more fish in the sea you know the saying.GOOD LUCK!
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I say kick him to the curb and move on. First rule is any man who is still living with his mother is not the marrying kind. There are exceptions but he is not one. You are wasting your life and time with this one. Move on now and meet someone who really wants to be with you. And not with his mom.
Good luck!
Good luck!
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Hello,
So long as you understand that any answer from anyone is only an opinion, read the rest.
You have stayed way too long already, if your goal is marriage. If your goal is to be with a man with whom you share love, forget about marriage and enjoy the loving relationship for what it is. If marriage is your main goal, tell him it is time to defecate or get off the pot. Pick a date say 6 months from now and tell him that on that date, come hell, high water and then some, you will be married or in someone else's arms, and stick to it without looking back.
I will be a 56 year old man tomorrow. I was horrendously commitment phobic and afraid that as soon as I got married, some one better would come along. I have had some wonderful relationships with some great women, a couple of whom would have been fabulous wives. I am now alone and miserable for it. It is my own fault and I truly got the misery I deserve.
After eight years, your man is not going to get off the pot unless pushed hard. You are too comfortable and too convenient for him now, why should he marry? This way he enjoys you, but keeps his options open. Maybe he plans to marry you when all his options dry up and women no longer show an interest in him. Tell him today!
All the best,
Ben
So long as you understand that any answer from anyone is only an opinion, read the rest.
You have stayed way too long already, if your goal is marriage. If your goal is to be with a man with whom you share love, forget about marriage and enjoy the loving relationship for what it is. If marriage is your main goal, tell him it is time to defecate or get off the pot. Pick a date say 6 months from now and tell him that on that date, come hell, high water and then some, you will be married or in someone else's arms, and stick to it without looking back.
I will be a 56 year old man tomorrow. I was horrendously commitment phobic and afraid that as soon as I got married, some one better would come along. I have had some wonderful relationships with some great women, a couple of whom would have been fabulous wives. I am now alone and miserable for it. It is my own fault and I truly got the misery I deserve.
After eight years, your man is not going to get off the pot unless pushed hard. You are too comfortable and too convenient for him now, why should he marry? This way he enjoys you, but keeps his options open. Maybe he plans to marry you when all his options dry up and women no longer show an interest in him. Tell him today!
All the best,
Ben
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" Is he worth waiting on? Are things going good without the marriage license? Do you really want to risk getting married and then having to divorce?" Just things to ponder. If you think about those questions long enough, you can answer your own question. He's not pushing the issue of marriage... That says a LOT.
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If he has not asked you to marry him by now... And if he is STILL living with his mom..... He never will. Why should he move out of mommy's house and have to be an adult when he can stay there and have her cater to his needs... Well, most of them..... Your best bet is to find someone new that will be a responsible and independent adult... Good Luck Hon.
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Well, I think you should nicley let him go because to me it seems like he doesn't want to marry you. But you never know.
GOOD LUCK!!!!
GOOD LUCK!!!!
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I'm sorry but I would forget him, 8 years is a while and if he said he was, why wouldn't he have already?
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Sorry, but I would not be the family farm on his promises. What can you expect from a man that age who is not independent? I know stranger things have proven to be good, but again.......save the farm
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This may help you alot." I have been with my fiance/ boyfriend for almost 16 years and he has told me we would get married but he always has excuses of why he can't marry me.When we met I was 32 years old and now I am 48 years old and he still gives me the same excuses that we dont go out enough and that I dont work out with him and how I need to go back to school.It doesn't matter that I am very attractive,loving and faithful to him.I have thought of leaving him on several occasions, but somehow I allow him to talk me into staying. He has even left me at the altar twice and cheated with other woman several times in this 16 year relationship.This has lowered my self esteem so low to the point of crying on a daily basis and having to get counselling to cope.The mere mention of a wedding or someone getting married depresses me.Dont get me wrong" I am happy for the person but my self esteem is so low I wonder" why doesn't he want me.One of his excuses is that he has to take care of his daughter who is 29 years and has finally decided to go to school and he can't afford it.So please don't waste as much of your life as I have because like one of the other people said " If he wanted to marry you there be nothing to hold him back. Sincerely CD
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Yes as long as you don't give him everything...make him feel like he earns the rest of it after marriage...it can be whatever is most deepest to you!!!
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