I'm pretty much I. The dark here but I think I'm sensing a tad of hostility. Oooops, I said something that is not an answer to the question, whatever that was.
It's a good step that you are aware of your tokophobia. The next step is to talk to an obstetrician about treatments for this. There could be medication and/or psychological help available.
As an aside, what does being a Christian have to do with your question?