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Hey, I have really bad trust issues so I haven't been able to speak to anyone and I just have to say this?

I hate myself. I hate everything about myself. My looks, my voice... my weight. I'm about 177cm tall and I weigh 63kg. I look at all these photos of people in my school and how pretty they are and their thy gaps and flat stomachs and I just wish I could have that.

Last year I tried everything I could to lose weight (i was 75kg). I tried everything, dieting, exercise... everything. Over the December holidays, I just stopped eating. I ate around 600 calories a day and I lost weight. By the end of the month, I was 67kg. One of the teachers at school that I'm quite close to noticed something wrong and spoke to me. I spoke to her once for about 10/15 minutes but she's leaving in a month. I cry every night because she's the only person that has actually given a shit (sorry for the language) and I love her for that but she's leaving. The other day I went into her class and asked if she told anyone and she said that she had to and she told my grade head.  I feel so scared around all of the teachers and I feel like that all know and they're all judging me and I feel so insecure.  I want to talk to someone about it but I cant. i would speak to my dad but i dont have a close relationship with him and i'd speak to my mom but i havent spoken to her in 6 months. I'm 15 and i currently weigh 63kg. I eat 400 calories or less a day and every time i look in the mirror i just want to cry. i hate my body. i hate how i can pinch and inch of my skin when i stand and i hate everything about myself.

 

i'm really sorry i just had to type this out.

Thanks x


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3 Answers

Walt O'Reagun Profile
Walt O'Reagun answered

You have an eating disorder, and need professional psychiatric help.

Pearl Lederman Profile
Pearl Lederman answered

rnaybe you should get sorne help if you feel that way

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Anonymous