That's something I never gave a lot of thought to, for some reason. Early on, it was an astronaut. Ultimately, the ideal occupation would have been a naturalist, out in the field. (forest, ideally) A forest ranger/warden would be great. Working with animals out in the country.........something along those lines.
No, I sure did not fulfill my "dream".
I didn't fulfill my dream of becoming an astronaut, I just became a space cadet in my mind.
I wanted to be a doctor at first for selfish reasons like having lots of money. Then it was a psychologist cuz I LOVED the study of the mind and why people do the things they do. Then it was to be a scientist doctor to find the cure for cancer cuz my grandma died of cancer. Then it was a medical assistant cuz I realized how much money and time I would have to have to be any kind of doctor. I succeeded at being a medical assistant, went to college with a five thousand dollar scholarship and graduated with a child on my hip. Lol! Then I got a boss who abused me and I quit..... Never to go back again. My husband just told me last night I would have made a wonderful doctor. He says I have a natural appetite for medical stuff. And though it was a sweet compliment I know I could of never found it in my heart to dedicate so much of my time to being a doctor. I take very good care of my family and get enough "medical" experience with them! Lolololololol!
Nope . . I am not half bionic, nor have I in the past or present run across the hood of a 1976 Gran Torino that is red with a White stripe.
I was supposed to be Starsky!
My mother was excellent at letting my brothers and I be kids. We were to go out try new things and live in the moment. We were never asked what we wanted to be when we grew up, and when someone tried to push us in a direction because of a current interest she quickly let them know it was something that wasn't allowed. We were to consider all the possibilities. We were in high school before that question came up. And then I was going to be a speech pathologist. Only problem was I had trouble saying it. Kind of hard to teach someone else to speak when you are having trouble.
Ten year old Janis wanted to be a private secretary just like Ann Sothern on her show. Fortunately, my expectations grew with age. LOL
When I was young, there were a lot of westerns on TV. I wanted to be a cowgirl so I could ride a horse. I've never been on a horse my whole life.
I wanted to be a nurse! But I went work for the summer and never left.
A lawyer.
I grew up poor so I wanted to be filthy rich. While studying for a profession that would make me somewhat rich, I actually fell in love with it. It's all smooth sailing from there as I feel I have the backings to become filthy rich once I grow enough guts and attain enough knowledge from people higher than me.
Can someone please help me? Please, please read the whole situation, and then please tell me your opinion. I am in a very weird situation (or state of mind). And the cause of that is a women. She is my professor. She is young and full of energy. I won't say that she is hot, but she is kinda attractive. She is at least 6-7 years older than me. I read mathematics, and before meeting her, maths was the only thing that I cared about ( I do care about my family though, but thats trivial). She teaches computer science, but her maths is weak. I don't want girlfriends ( and friends even..) because they are waste of precious time, and I never had any friend after my primary school. As you can guess, external beauty is nothing for a person who just lives to be a scientist and serve mankind, fundamentally I liked her because I thought she is very intelligent, and if she became my friend then it will be twice beneficial, as I am good in mathematics and logic... ( NO!! Its not ego, its what everyone says, I feel like genius among stupids!!). I thought that I can help her, and if I get her company, then it will be a great motivator for me as well. So I started to talk to her. But as time passed, I became like obsessed with her, I have been thinking continuously about her since last 6 months... Yes continuously every single day ( I maintained a dairy in which I ticked the day I though about her more than 3 hours... And every day is ticked in it!!!). Sometime I wonder if I have fallen in love with her???
[One little side note: I did many kind things for her, and she also appreciates it.... ]
She is doing her PhD, so I asked her if learning maths will be beneficial for her, she said of course. I called her next day, and said that how are you planning to learn higher maths, what books are you referring to..etc. She had no idea at all, so I asked her that would you read if I write for you an explanation of concepts? She said yes she would. I said that I need to discuss you and ask you few questions to get to know the level of your knowledge. She said, yes why not do it as soon as possible!! [I was surprised, how come she agreed so quick!]
We met for an hour two times, and I came to know that she don't know too much. But as the time passed, she forgot almost everything... Blah blah blah...
So main thing is that, I loved her due to her knowledge, but now I know that she is neither very intelligent nor she is much interested in knowing new things, she just want to get a permanent job and nothing else. I asked her many times that life is given just once to you, please ma'am try to do something bigger...
I don't know how to leave her... I can't focus on studies... Tomorrow is my exam and I am writing this... I don't know if I can ever get her or not [ I fear that she is already with someone...]. I don't like anyone else... She seems to be the best to me... (but she is not... ). Sometimes I become so distressed that I don't even eat for days... I just want to be her friend.... But she just wants me to be her student. She is a kind women, and occasionally makes me feel special. [ Like she calls me whenever I ask her to do so, she answers almost everything I asked...{but when I asked her about her birthday, she said that "It doesn't matters, so leave it." }, ]
But she does so many things that hurt me and make me feel like that she doesn't care about me a bit...
Believe me, its not the case of sexual attraction ( or is it???) , I just like her and want to be around her, while studying... I want her to do good things in her life, be something...
I am pretty sure that she is the first and the last women I love, but I dont think that there is a future in this, she will get married before I'll get a good job!.
I never said I love you to her, but I have told her many times that she is very sweet and beautiful, and I like her nature and character ( well she actually is!!!) . She changed me, I had no feeling for human emotions, but I now I know that they do exist, and are usually out of our control. What should I do, should I study and be something and then propose her... Or should I just forget her.
[ She doesn't got many things due to which I fall for her..., and even after telling her many times that this hurts me, she didn't care!]
Please share your view and experiences on that.
Didn't find the answer you were looking for?
